5 Mistakes I made in My Twenties
Updated: Sep 13, 2021
Twenties is the age of entering & exploring the World on our own. It's the age where we start forming our own beliefs but are still shadowed by our upbringing and environment where we grew up. This is the age where we do tend to make a lot of mistakes and I too have made a lot of them. Some of them I have listed below which may prevent you heartaches and make you live regret free in those prime years:
1. Following the herd
This has to top the list. I grew up in a school atmosphere where achievements were highly valued. The more qualified you were, the more likable you would become. The only route everyone knew was Engineering. Whether or not it's your passion, you go where the herd goes. This is my number one regret, as I wish I had invested my time and energy on learning things I am passionate about. Although, at that time I had no clarity as to what my passions were as I was busy becoming like everyone else but if I would have got an opportunity to change this thing, I would go back and prevent myself from following the herd and listening to my heart. So how to know if you are following the herd or is it something you really want? Listen to your intuition. If the thing everyone is doing brings you Joy and you feel expansive then go ahead with it but if the thought of it makes you feel contracted then maybe it's not for you.
2. Staying in Comfort zone
This is another big mistake. Comfort zone Robs you out of good Opportunities to grow as a person. Whenever any difficult situation arises, you tend to fall back to your old patterns and habits. This is called the comfort zone. This comes from our survival instinct dominant brain which tries to keep you physically and mentally safe. But when you play too safe, chances are that your growth stunts and this can make you a miserable person from inside. This doesn't mean to do things that you don't wanna do. This actually means quite the opposite. It means going for things that you Really wanna do from the bottom of your heart no matter what the obstacle is. Your comfort zone will pull you in immediately when you face your first obstacle but the right thing to do here is to go ahead no matter what, if your destination is something you really want from your soul.
3. Not taking risks
The earlier you take risks, especially in your career, the better you can manage it in this age. Not taking risks is part of being in the comfort zone and with age & growing responsibilities, your risk taking capacity also reduces. This is the right time to go ahead with your dream projects. But do have a Plan B And Plan C for a back up in case things don't turn out the way you desired.
4. Trying to be perfect
Twenties is the age when we are super conscious of our image and want to impress the entire World. But this is a very dangerous mistake most of us can tend to make as we are not being our authentic selves when we are trying to portray ourselves as perfect. Imperfection is the way of Life and when we resist that, the only outcome would be of feeling stress and emptiness. The way out of this is to understand that our ego seeks perfection while soul accepts things as is. And although improving yourself is a good thing when you want to experience life in a better way but trying to become perfect in order to impress people can make you waste your prime years in a pursuit that's not going to bring you any joy. People's opinion about you keeps changing as per circumstances and the wise thing to do here is to only impress yourself i.e. make fill yourself with Joy.
5. Afraid of being Vulnerable
Vulnerability is an important aspect in all aspects of your life, especially in relationships. It doesn't mean throwing yourself open to each and everyone you meet but if you feel that you resonate with someone on either intellectual, emotional or spiritual level, you should go ahead and dare to be a little vulnerable. What I have learnt is the more vulnerable you are, the better and deep the connection is with that person. We resist being vulnerable for the bring of making a fool of ourselves or fearing rejection. What differentiates one deep connection from another superficial connection is the depth in which both have exchanged their emotions, dreams , fear, frustrations, disappointments with each other. But the important thing to note here is that, do not be Vulnerable to everyone. Especially if you feel you cannot trust someone when you are being Vulnerable with them and they use that information or closeness against you then in that case stay clear of the person but if you feel there is some positive and soulful connection with the person then vulnerability will only make your bond stronger. If I had known this earlier, maybe I would have had more deep and soulful connections.
Hopefully these points may shed some light on ways you can prevent regret from piling up later in your life. Having said that, be easy on yourself and don't play too safe in order to not make any mistake. Because mistake are the tools that help you grow. Did any point resonate with your life? Comment below and share your knowledge.