Updated: Dec 2, 2020
2019 was the year, when I was blessed with a Baby Girl. No matter how tiring & exhausting motherhood can be, but it is an extremely rewarding experience with many Life Lessons hidden in the entire journey. Here are 10 Lessons which I learnt in my journey and wish to Learn more:
1. Be in the present moment
If you have observed a child around the age of 1, they are always in the present moment. They are completely absorbed in the activity they are doing. Unlike adults, they are not living in the past or worrying about the future. Be it playing, exploring new things or feeding, they are totally in the "flow" state, absorbed in every activity. They are aware of the environment and they pay attention to each & everything that is happening around. For example, my daughter could notice a dog barking distantly which I usually couldn't pay attention to. I only came to know that a dog is barking when she would point out. We adults have so much mental chatter at every moment that we forget to notice the present moment.
2. Don't hold grudges
Alright, let me admit. As parents, there are times when we have not changed the diaper on time, couldn't feed the baby on time, been busy with our work that deprived them of the much required attention etc. The child will cry and throw tantrums to get all of these things done but that's about it. He or she will not hold the grudge for years. They will forget about it soon after we have met their needs. This is so opposite of adults, as we carry grudges for years. Now many would say that the problem adults face are more serious than the child's problem. But mind it, every problem at a particular age is equally big or serious for that age as it would be for an adult. So we need to learn the ability to move on and keep a clean slate.
3. Let go of the need to control
With a child in the house, every moment is uncertain. When they will pee, sleep or feed, is not in our control. And I am a planner by nature. But after having a child, I have learnt to let go of the need to control my circumstances. Instead of getting overwhelmed with the chaos in the house, I have learnt to embrace it & mould myself accordingly. Life is like this only. No matter how much we plan our Life in detail, we get stumbled by unexpected situations that Life throws us into! So instead of getting bogged down by it, just think about what Life is trying to teach us. With a child, I think, Life is trying to teach us to be Present in the moment & let go of the need to control your circumstances or people.
PS: Your OCD will also go once you have a child ;)
4.Try & try till you succeed
In the first year itself, a child goes through a lot of transformation and achieves crucial milestones like sitting, crawling, standing up with & without support, walking with support & finally walking without support. The wonderful thing about achieving these milestones is how much effort a child puts into achieving this. He falls so many times. Many times he gets hurt in the process. But he or she never gets discouraged to try again. They will again put the effort & try once again. There is a cheerleader in their head who constantly motivates them to try till they succeed. Even after falling many times, they rise up again.
5. Get out of Comfort Zone
Now, if you have observed a child, they are always willing to try new things. They try to imitate all the things adults are doing. They are willing to explore new places & are always curious. This is what helps them grow and expand their knowledge. We adults on the other hand, resist change & are unwilling to go out of our comfort zone which stalls our personal & spiritual growth!
6. Express your feelings
If a child is in distress, hungry or wounded, he or she will immediately start crying. They will not suffer in silence. They will let everyone know that they are in need of something. They ask for what they want like it's their right to get a solution! This quality is essential to improve our situation at any point in Life!
7. Keep Learning
Their desire to learn everything is amazing! They read playbooks, watch cartoons, play with toys, explore every item in the house, observe parents' actions & learn each & everything. How quickly they grasp things was known to me when my 9 month old daughter not only started imitating the words we spoke but also started copying actions like combing, eating with hands, dancing etc. This quality keeps one young and mentally active! Also they learn by example. So if you want to influence anyone, be the change and you will inspire everyone to become that change!
8. Joy is in simple things
If you notice a child, it is very easy to make a child laugh or smile. They find pleasure & joy in small things! Like making funny sound, water flowing from the tap, playing in water, making a mess, seeing a child laugh on TV, playing with a soft toy, listening to their favorite rhyme, cuddling them, playing peek-a-boo, eating their favorite food etc etc. These simple things make them so happy & it reminds us that joy is not in the materialistic pleasures like power & fame but in simple things which bring smile, laughter, fun & warmth in our Lives.
9. Everyday is a new day
Whenever a child wakes up, he or she wakes up feeling fresh, forgetting what happened yesterday & ready to take on a new day with enthusiasm and positivity. They look at everyday as a new day and do the same activities with the same zeal and energy. Even if they get bored, they will find new ways to keep themselves entertained!
10. Love unconditionally
Now many would say that a child's love is conditional as we feed them, take care of them, they are dependent on us that is why they return affection. But I realised with their warm hugs, they sharing their food & toys with us, they getting concerned when we get wounded and always touch at the wound in an attempt to make it alright, that this Love is beyond condition. They genuinely care & love us to their core. In fact, on the contrary, adults love conditionally. There are very few parents who love their child without expecting anything in return. Hence, I am learning to love unconditionally because in this, lies true essence of our Being.❣️
I think because of these qualities it is said that "Children are the Forms of God". Somewhere as we grow up, we lose touch with our inner purity and hence look for all these treasures in all the wrong places. I will try to imbibe these qualities so as to live a life which is true to my inner being. What have you learnt from a child? Comment below and enlighten us!